Happy New Year beloveds!
My year has been off to such a great start I haven’t been able to blog until now. Seriously, it has been truly amazing. There are so many new and exciting changes. I’m still not where I want to be, but I’m on my way – and for that I am so grateful. Not to mention, I’m not where I used to be. And for that THANK YOU GOD!
But, as always, my experiences got me to thinking…and asking questions.
First of all, I thought about where I am now compared to where I used to be. As I’ve said on here in the past, my circumstances haven’t changed…but I have. And it’s had a tremendous impact on how I view things and respond to them. In other words, if I were experiencing all the same things, but with the understanding of life, Love and Spirit that I possessed six or so years ago, I might not be here right now. And I certainly couldn’t share it publicly.
That led me to another thought… I was so self-destructive. I called it living, but I often chose activities that could (and frankly should) have killed me!
But I always felt alive. There was a rush – a thrill – associated with coming so close to death and walking away. At the time I thought I was somehow special, remarkable, invincible. Of course, I know better now. Yes, I always did it big…loud and wrong, and without regret.
But I had to ask myself: Are you quilling to be as loud doing what’s right? Are you willing to make folks uncomfortable for what you believe in now…peace, Love, harmony, legacy? Are you really a go big, all or nothing kinda gal or is it only when you’re trying to justify doing that which you know you have no business doing?
Naturally, I wanted to believe that this was true. Of course I do it big…even now. Right? Surely I’ve made people uncomfortable with the Truth. Though I always say it with Love, compassion, understanding and gentility – the Truth is confrontational and abrasive. It’s like burning salve. It stings as it cleans the wound and exposes what’s dead so it can be peeled off and discarded. It feels good once everything is healed up but that initial application is the worst.
Then something else occurred to me…But hurting people’s feelings isn’t loving. Right? Surely I need to be careful what I say. But in reality, all I’ve done is bite my tongue and mince my words trying to keep the peace. Though it isn’t really peace when nothing changes. It’s more so damage control than creating sustainability.
And there it was…my Truth, my aha moment. I’d rather be loud and wrong defending my self than be even quiet and right at the direction of my Self, for fear of what people might think, say or do.
Well, as you likely know if you’ve been with me for a while (and will learn soon if you haven’t), every new year I choose a mantra to keep me focused. This year’s mantra is OWN IT.
Own up to it. Claim it. Work it. Own it. Whatever it is…just own it. Whatever you did (or didn’t do)…own it. Whatever it takes to get where you need to be for harmonious living…own it.
I would rather be loud and wrong than quiet and right. People don’t like you when you’re right all the time. Even if you never say I told you so, they hear it in their own heads (with your voice).
Well, the fact is I am right…a lot. And I don’t like being right about the things I’m right about anymore than the people who are doing the things I’m right about want me to be right about them. But hey, I have insight, foresight and ESP…whaddya gonna do, right?
Me? I’m going to own it from now on. Expect me be right this year, period. Quiet, loud, silent, in ASL or Dolby digital surround sound…it’s going down. If I’m right, I’m right (and if I’m wrong I’m wrong).
Expect to hear me talking like I know what I’m taking about even if you didn’t give me those details I seem so well versed on. (How and why I know what I do is another post for another time, just remember: insight, foresight, ESP. *shrug*). Expect me to be bold in Love and reckless in faith…but understand that mama didn’t raise no fools.
Yes, expect to see me own it.
A funny thing happens when you own up to your life…you realize no one can stand or has been standing in your way except you. And, suddenly, you’re moving – first aside, then forward.
So hope about it? Are you ready to own it all this year so you can have it all?
Normally, I’d say good luck, but you’re not gonna need it this time. Namaste.